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| Rev.Fr. Augustine Vallooran V.C. |
All
of us want to be remembered for posterity. We evaluate our life by how well we
would be remembered. Consciously and even unconsciously our choices, decisions,
occupations, ways of talking and styles of living are moulded by the expectation
of how we want to be remembered. The son of a famous boxer recounts how his dad
told him that he should always remember his father as the most powerful man in
the world as that memory would encourage him to pursue his father’s footsteps.
A rich man who built the village chapel would always point it out to his
children saying that they should always be proud of their father for this
contribution of his.
“This Is My Body… Broken For You” (Luke 22:19)
The
Lord Jesus asks us to remember Him as the One who offered His Body to be broken
and His Blood to be shed for us. This was His parting wish expressed at the
Last Supper. While blessing the bread, the Lord said to His companions “This is my
body to be broken for you” and taking the chalice of wine and said
to them - “This
is my blood to be shed for you” (Luke 22:19-20). Jesus then told
them “Do
this in memory of me whenever you gather together in my name.” Jesus
in His three years of ministry performed great miracles that left people
wonder-struck. He taught authoritatively of the mysteries of the Divinity and
his listeners were amazed. However it was not by His spectacular actions and
remarkable teachings that He wanted to be remembered but by the self-offering
He made for us that we may life and have it in abundance.
Often
we tend to interpret the Passion and Death of Jesus as if He was the helpless
victim of the circumstances. The Lord however makes it very clear to His
disciples that it was His choice to lay down His life for the salvation of humankind
was His priority. “No one snatches my life away but I willingly lay it down.”
(John 10:18) In fact that was
the purpose the Father sent Him to the world for. As John records, “The bread that I will give for the life of the world is
my flesh… for my flesh is true food and my blood is true drink” (John 6:51,55)
The gospel records that with
this, many of His followers scandalized by the claim, walked away from the
Master. The gospel also reveals that Jesus did not call them back. Neither did He
take His promise back. Rather He turned to the twelve disciples and asked them - “Do you also wish to go away?” (John 6:67)
This
stance of Jesus makes His life mission clear to us. He had come to give us the
fullness of life by the ultimate expression of love of sacrificing Himself in
order to become food for us. This is what we remember, celebrate and
re-experience every time we gather at the altar. It is when we stand at the
altar that we really understand who we are in terms of how precious we are to
Jesus. He places such value on us that He even opts to forsake His life that we
may live forever. In order that we may never forget this ultimate expression of
love, He offered His Body and Blood for us to feed on.
“Do Not Remember the Former Things” (Isaiah 43:18)
It is very significant that Jesus
inaugurated the Last Supper with this expression: “I have desired with a great desire to eat
this Passover meal with you.” (Luke 22) Every
time we gather at the altar, we remember that the Lord waits for us. When we
affirm our faith in the Real Presence of Jesus in the Holy Eucharist, we settle
for an intellectual acceptance of the doctrine that Jesus is truly present in
the Eucharistic bread. However this truth should lead us further to understand
and experience that He is present in the Eucharistic bread in order to be
present to us. He said that even a strand of hair falling from our head is
counted by Him (Matthew
10:30). Even the seeming trifles of our life do not escape the keen loving
attention of the Lord. In our day to day life we are often hurt by the
indifference of others. We are worried about the uncertainty of the future. We
are insulted by the thoughtless arrogance of those we must interact with. We are
haunted by the painful memories of the past. Such overwhelming negative
experiences of our past could lead us to lonely depression where we are left
wondering whether anyone cares for us. The antidote to every such moment is the
invitation of the Lord from the Holy Eucharist, “Come to me,
all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.”
(Matthew 11:28) Every
negative experience of our life should lead us to turn our attention to the Heart
of Jesus throbbing in the Eucharist to receive us and replace every burden of pain
and sin with His satisfying love.
All
of us carry a heavy baggage of painful memories of the past – memories that
hurt, tempt and depress us; memories that trigger anger and despair. These
memories will continue to weigh us down till it pushes us to our downfall. We
can wonder, “Is there any way out? The Eucharist presents the one way – that it
is in Christ’s unquestioning unlimited saving love.
“See, I Am Making All Things New” (Revelations 21:5)
A young college student came for
a retreat. He had grown up in the Gulf. He came to India to pursue studies in
engineering. Cut away from home, parents and community, he clung on to his new-found
friends and soon lost his orientations and fervour of faith. He was led astray
into an unholy way of living. He hardly attended college and did not clear any
of the papers in the first year. He was shocked but his friends advised him to
laugh it off. He never told his parents anything and continued to follow the
careless ways of his friends. Towards the end of the second year, his principal
summoned him to inform him that he could continue in the college only if he
completed the papers of both years together. This time, his friends had no
answer for him. Reality struck him hard! He was so distressed. He sought the
advice of his local guardian who sent him for the retreat.
He
was very distressed and came to meet me at the very beginning of the retreat and
share how bitter he felt. He told me that he had wasted all the money sent by
his parents and the great opportunity he had for a excellent training in
engineering. However the most painful fact was that he wasted the trust his
parents had placed in him. “I have made a dirty mess of my life and there is
definitely no way out of this,” he concluded. I encouraged him to put his trust
in God and offer himself totally in the Hands of God believing in what Jesus
said, “Nothing
is impossible to God.” (Mark 10:27)
At
the end of the retreat, he joyfully approached me to share his testimony. He
recalled how on the third day, while he was participating in the Holy Mass, God
spoke life to his heart once more. During the Offertory, all the unbearable
memories of his sinful life surfaced piercing his heart. He then remembered
that he was just told not to cling on to such haunting memories with regret -
rather to offer every such memory with the piece of bread on the altar to the
Lord. He faithfully did so. During the time of Consecration, while the priest
was praying the words of Christ at the Last Supper, “This is my body broken for you”,
the words resounded in his heart as though the Voice of Jesus was whispering it
to him. It occurred to him that the piece of bread on the altar had become the
symbol of his own sinful past which Jesus took in His Hands and held close to His
Heart declaring “This is mine.” He felt love gushing into his heart when Jesus
took as His own the dirty mess of his past. In the Heart of Jesus, the misery
of his past was transformed in a flame of love! He could not hear anything
anymore except the whisper of Jesus, “This is my body.” All the painful memories of
his past vanished from his heart as it was now replaced by a new experience.
When he opened his eyes it was time for the Holy Communion. He received the Body
of Christ and he felt engulfed in a flame of love. He knew he was a new
creation in the Eucharistic experience.
I
met this young man three years later. I realized that everything was changed
about him. It had become a daily habit for him to participate in the Holy Mass.
Every time he was in the church by the side of the altar, the precious memory
he had in the retreat centre invariably surfaced filling his heart with that
warmth of Christ’s Love making him His
own. He gained enough strength to say a definite goodbye to his old friends and
old lifestyle. Even the memories of the sinful past had been washed off as a
new memory had taken root in his heart. He passed out of the college as the
first rank holder. He finally confided to me, “Father, whenever I have been
faced with difficult and tense situations, the memory of my experience at the
Eucharist gives me a confidence that carries me through the storms.” I was
reminded of St. Paul who said, “I live by faith in
the Son of God who loved me and gave Himself up for me.” (Galatians 2:20)
“The Old Has Gone, The New Is Here!” (2 Corinthians
5:17)
One
can ask, “What’s in a memory?” Indeed. memories make or mar a human person.
Psychologists today tell us that the memories we choose to hold on to will
mould or distort our character. Though all of us are living in the present, our
ways of thinking and styles of living are determined decisively by our
understanding of the past events. If we cherish memories of being loved,
appreciated and admired, we would have positive approaches in our relationships
and be optimistic in our attitudes to life’s challenges. However if all the
time we nurse in bitterness the negative memories of being rejected, sidelined
and let down, fear and pessimism will color our expectations. Then we will not
be able to trust anyone and we will become melancholic in temperament and
judgmental in character.
We
are not condemned to be stuck to our past forever. Our hurts were caused by the
denial of love. Therefore our healing is made possible with a fresh flow of God’s
Love that is unchanging and that will establish us through affirmation where we
earlier were shattered because we were rejected and sidelined. For this crucial
purpose of restoration, Jesus instituted the Holy Eucharist. By offering to
feed us with His Body and Blood, Jesus promises us that in order not to die, we
need to eat of His Body and drink of His Blood.
Indeed
we live in a culture of death because of the unhappy and unholy memories that weigh
us down. When we come before the altar, we are reminded of how much we are
loved and valued. This memory flashes a light on our soul that will diminish
and vanquish the shadows of our painful past. The Holy Eucharist is given to us
by the Lord in His Infinite Love towards our continued and complete healing.
We
are living in a world that is negative and rude. We daily encounter persons and
situations that can be demoralizing. It is precisely therefore that the daily
Eucharist becomes relevant and crucial as a healing balm and a source of strength
and will see us walk through the fire and come out unscathed.
Let Us
Pray
Thank
you Lord for opening Your Heart to us and offering Your Body and Blood for our
daily sustenance. The tiring and burdening experiences of our life and the
wounds of the past continue to haunt us, raising fears and questions. Your Love
manifested in the Holy Eucharist is what reassures and strengthens us. Lead us by
Your Grace to Your Altar daily and that we may be nourished by Your Life-giving
Body and Blood.
Let us never languish in the prison of the
past for Your Love sets us free. Being liberated by the outpouring of Your Love,
we will become channels of Your Love and Peace to everyone around us.
Amen.
